Friday, February 24, 2012

Why did I cut my hair?

Why did I cut my hair?  My hair used to be my favorite thing about my appearance. There's the quick and dirty answer: "I thought short hair would be easier to manage." (It's not.) My long hair was always a crutch. A beautiful one, at that. One quick hair flip and I could avoid an awkward conversation or cover up a clingy sweater. Those lovely strands of protein provided me a comfort zone, a place where I could hide.

Why did I deactivate my Facebook?  Facebook used to be my favorite way to express myself. Those precious surface-level conversations and passive aggressive inside jokes meant to be seen by everyone but the person to whom I sent them were my jam. The hours logged being pretty just to post pictures were some of my most enjoyable -- and rewarding, too, viz. OMG RATNAAA your gorgeoussssss<3 and the like.

Why did I take a gap year?  School used to be my favorite place to be. School is safe. Knowledge is God's most beautiful gift to mankind, and it's scary for me to have to get it anywhere but in school. But I kind of dared myself, just to see if I could. And the funny thing is, I win either way because whatever happens, I'm learning.

Truth is, sometimes I feel naked without my hair, lonely without my Facebook, and lost without an institution to call my own. But for me, this year is about learning to be all those things. So Emerson, I'm making my own path and leaving a trail -- even if it's a trail of hair.



7 comments:

  1. "Why did I cut my hair?" is an incredible post!

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  2. i didn't know you felt that way about your hair. i like it short

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  3. that's my favorite quote (the emerson one) ever!! i do that when i ski! but then i fall on my face...awkward...

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  4. loved this one...easy to connect..

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